Well folks, it's finally here...the infamous steps to getting over a breakup...david and i went through them all in 5 minutes...but we're above average emotionally :) ....ah well - enjoy! (for the full story, see "Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye" which is located in the January Archives)
STEP # 1 - TOGETHER
STEP # 2 - CONFLICT
STEP # 3 - FORGIVE BUT NOT FORGET
STEP # 4 - BLAMESHIFTING
STEP # 5 - ANGER
STEP # 6 - BITTERNESS
STEP # 7 - SORROW
STEP # 8 - THOUGHTFULNESS
STEP # 9 - ACCEPTANCE
STEP # 10 - FRIENDS
Saturday, January 29, 2005
Friday, January 28, 2005
a broken furnace and a house full of single firemen
ah, the adventures never stop at the all-new Hot 116 Colborne street house.....the furnace broke yesterday just as we were about to have a fabulous dinner party for the 3 houses (i live in a tri-plex), and the temperature went down to 11 C....so we lit a bunch of candles and were all bundled during dinner as the furnace guy came to fix it..good times!!...but then TODAY, it kept making loud noises and right before we were about to go to bed after a night of take-out swiss chalet, wine, Adicted to Love, and trying to decide whether or not our ex-boyfriends were really gay, Laura, Lindsay and I smelled burning oil!!! Not good...so I really wanted to just leave it....but Laura and Lindsay decided that the smart and safe thing to do would be to call the non-emergency fire department line....so we did and to our surprise in about 3 minutes, 2 fire trucks came roaring down the street with lights flashing and everything! so then 4 very cute fire fighters came to our rescue.....they found, naturally, that nothing was out of the ordinary, unless you count the 3 giggling girls in their pj's flashing pictures..the one Matt Damon look-alike in the red hat kept saying, "alright now ladies, what are you up to??" .....until next time, remember, "only you can prevent forest fires!"
okay and laura wanted me to add that tonight, with the firemen and all, Hot 116 just got HOTTER!!!
:)
-J
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
a fainting spell and a hole through the drywall
so, as you can pretty much guess by the title and the pic, today i fainted and bashed my head through the drywall...ouch!!!...i just stood up too quickly, got a head rush, tried to balance myself, and then the next thing i remember "KABOOOM!" - my picture frame, wall clock, and longboard crashed to the ground, and i was laying on the floor with a really sore head.....my new roomate laura came rushing in and was like, "are you OK??" and i was like, "i have no idea what just happened - i think i just blacked out" and we turned to look at the dry wall and there is a HUGE, head-sized hole all the way through....my head is still throbbing!! ah, sorry jared and kath, your house know has 103 holes in the wall instead of 102....
-J
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
me & a butterfly
guess what? i've finally learned how to upload pictures! wahoo! so this is just a test pic of me last summer...ah...i miss the blonde & pink hair....
p.s.
it is now super easy to post comments - even if you are not a blogger yourself, and without any passwords if you are ....hurray for Jared in helping me figure out this odd technology....
-Jen
-Jen
say goodnight, not goodbye
well, it has been an interesting week....probably the most news-worthy event is that david and I have called it quits....yep, we ended our 2-week grade 8 relationship...sigh....but the hilarious thing is, it was the best break-up in the history of break-ups...so sit right back and i'll tell you the tale....and i CHALLENGE any of you out there to top this with a better break-up story...
so the last two weeks were very fun, david and i got along great; we've always had a lot of chemistry and we laugh constantly - he really is one of the funnest people i've met this year....but as things went on, i think we both started to realize that the timing was really bad....we both have other "issues" that we are attempting to sort out in our lives and we started to feel like things were moving way too quickly....it just started to feel...unnatural....so david went on a Navigators retreat this past weekend, and i had my own mini-retreat here in Kingston - mostly consisting of me getting super organized and spending a lot of time praying about my priorities and what type of person i want to be - mainly principled, and acting on these principles, focused, disciplined, etc....as I prayed i realized that one of the most important things i know i need to be right now is independent....learning to be okay on my own, and not needing people so much to define me....especially with me travelling next year on my own (i'm thinking now of teaching ESL in taiwan or dubai, UAE), i need to get used to being ok with just being with me....
so okay this is where it starts to get funny....so david gets back from his retreat and i get a rushed email from him on monday basically saying, "we need to talk. stop by after class. -me." so knowing that nothing good could possibly come of that, i email him back saying, "ha....i know what's coming and i agree. see you shortly." So nervously i skip the rest of class and walk to his house...he opens the door and i'm like, "hey! so....ok let's just get this over with....let's make this the FUNNEST breakup ever!" and david, being just as adventurous and silly as me, is all game...so we download chantal kreviazuk's "say goodnight, not goodbye" and make it our breakup song....we listen to it while mentally enjoying a slideshow of the last two week's memories together (ah...longboarding, chopping oinions, taking soren out for breakfast).. then we enjoy a "grade 8 akward dance" to end our grade 8 relationship.... then we do "classic breakup lines"...."david, its not you, its me" and "jen, its not me, its you...and you're weird!"....and "david, you're a wonderful person, but, i think i need something deeper in life right now."....haha it was funny...
so THEN, we talk for real about why it just doesn't feel right, and yadda, yadda, yadda, we're done....so then we decide to take pictures of the 10 Stages of Getting Over a Breakup....being together, conflict, forgive but not forget, blameshifting, anger, sorrow, bitterness, thoughtfulness, acceptance, and friends .....so we took pictures of us in all these stages (as soon as i figure out how i will upload them), and it was hilarious....so then we finally say goodbye, and i'm on my merry way...and then as i'm walking away, he's looking at me and we run towards each other in an embrace, faking regret and saying, LOUDLY, "dear! i take it all back! i change my mind! i love you, i NEED you!!!" and then he stops and says, seriously, "k, so i'll see you tommorrow?" and i'm like, "yep, sounds good!" and then we part, laughing.....ahhh, i love that kid, and i'm sooooo excited to be his friend....:)
alright, so if any of you have any better breakup stories, i CHALLENGE you to beat this one....cuz i think it was the best one in the history of ever.....!
More to come on the more serious things that have been floating through my head....cuz there have been lots- no really!....i.e. my struggles with mixing faith and global politics, teaching ESL in an oil country, thinking about the possibility of being a pastor (eek! but i'm a WOMAN!), reflecting on the Holocaust Industry (a book by Norman Finkelstein which argues that the Holocaust is being exploited by some Jewish organizations in order to recieve finacial compensation and justify Israeli war crimes-whoa -its heavy stuff), thinking Christianly about technology and such....wow...stay tuned...!
-Jen
so the last two weeks were very fun, david and i got along great; we've always had a lot of chemistry and we laugh constantly - he really is one of the funnest people i've met this year....but as things went on, i think we both started to realize that the timing was really bad....we both have other "issues" that we are attempting to sort out in our lives and we started to feel like things were moving way too quickly....it just started to feel...unnatural....so david went on a Navigators retreat this past weekend, and i had my own mini-retreat here in Kingston - mostly consisting of me getting super organized and spending a lot of time praying about my priorities and what type of person i want to be - mainly principled, and acting on these principles, focused, disciplined, etc....as I prayed i realized that one of the most important things i know i need to be right now is independent....learning to be okay on my own, and not needing people so much to define me....especially with me travelling next year on my own (i'm thinking now of teaching ESL in taiwan or dubai, UAE), i need to get used to being ok with just being with me....
so okay this is where it starts to get funny....so david gets back from his retreat and i get a rushed email from him on monday basically saying, "we need to talk. stop by after class. -me." so knowing that nothing good could possibly come of that, i email him back saying, "ha....i know what's coming and i agree. see you shortly." So nervously i skip the rest of class and walk to his house...he opens the door and i'm like, "hey! so....ok let's just get this over with....let's make this the FUNNEST breakup ever!" and david, being just as adventurous and silly as me, is all game...so we download chantal kreviazuk's "say goodnight, not goodbye" and make it our breakup song....we listen to it while mentally enjoying a slideshow of the last two week's memories together (ah...longboarding, chopping oinions, taking soren out for breakfast).. then we enjoy a "grade 8 akward dance" to end our grade 8 relationship.... then we do "classic breakup lines"...."david, its not you, its me" and "jen, its not me, its you...and you're weird!"....and "david, you're a wonderful person, but, i think i need something deeper in life right now."....haha it was funny...
so THEN, we talk for real about why it just doesn't feel right, and yadda, yadda, yadda, we're done....so then we decide to take pictures of the 10 Stages of Getting Over a Breakup....being together, conflict, forgive but not forget, blameshifting, anger, sorrow, bitterness, thoughtfulness, acceptance, and friends .....so we took pictures of us in all these stages (as soon as i figure out how i will upload them), and it was hilarious....so then we finally say goodbye, and i'm on my merry way...and then as i'm walking away, he's looking at me and we run towards each other in an embrace, faking regret and saying, LOUDLY, "dear! i take it all back! i change my mind! i love you, i NEED you!!!" and then he stops and says, seriously, "k, so i'll see you tommorrow?" and i'm like, "yep, sounds good!" and then we part, laughing.....ahhh, i love that kid, and i'm sooooo excited to be his friend....:)
alright, so if any of you have any better breakup stories, i CHALLENGE you to beat this one....cuz i think it was the best one in the history of ever.....!
More to come on the more serious things that have been floating through my head....cuz there have been lots- no really!....i.e. my struggles with mixing faith and global politics, teaching ESL in an oil country, thinking about the possibility of being a pastor (eek! but i'm a WOMAN!), reflecting on the Holocaust Industry (a book by Norman Finkelstein which argues that the Holocaust is being exploited by some Jewish organizations in order to recieve finacial compensation and justify Israeli war crimes-whoa -its heavy stuff), thinking Christianly about technology and such....wow...stay tuned...!
-Jen
Monday, January 17, 2005
reconnecting
ahhh...nothing says a perfect weekend than reconnecting with old friends - and forming a deeper bond with a new one....kath, jared, and soren came down for the weekend - which was great....i forgot how much i looooooooooove soren - we had a great time playing guitar (i taught him that there are elves inside the guitar, and eventually he was thanking the elves for jesus! sorry for the eventual re-education you'll have to do one day jared)...then david, ahem, mario....and i took him out for lunch and everyone thought we were his parents!! teehee that was exciting...then there was praise and power last night....God was talking to me deeply, and the reconnection was just what i needed ...i rediscovered what it means to fully trust, and fully surrender.....and i'm amazed again....
as i go into this new week i don't think that i want to work at an international school - i really don't like the idea of working at a richy - rich private school with american standards and a stressed-out academic focus....just not me....so i slept in and didn't even finish the application process....i'm excited to see what God has for me next year.....full of surprises is He! but oh, how exciting and how rewarding to not be afraid....!
as i go into this new week i don't think that i want to work at an international school - i really don't like the idea of working at a richy - rich private school with american standards and a stressed-out academic focus....just not me....so i slept in and didn't even finish the application process....i'm excited to see what God has for me next year.....full of surprises is He! but oh, how exciting and how rewarding to not be afraid....!
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
blissful existence
k, so i'm adjusting to independent living much quicker and better than i ever thought possible....it is actually really great! i'm more self-disciplined than i've ever been in my entire life - i'm waking up earlier to spend quality time with God, I'm listening to LOUD music while making breakfast, i'm trying out new and exotic recipes, and i'm going for runs like 3 times a week! and.......there is another reason why i'm really, really giddily happy but i can't really tell you yet....well, ok i will anyways....so i had a DTR (define the relationship) talk with this boy, we'll call him.....Mario....and we've decided that we are....SEEING each other.....isn't that marvelous...marvelous i say! what exactly does that mean? well, i have no idea but i know that it is a good thing and a neccessary step before the big title of "going out"....seriously....let's do away with these labels....i feel soo.....restricted....no just joking i'm still just giddy! hurray for pottery class with Mario tommorrow! (maybe if you're all good i'll tell you his REAL name next time!)
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Happy Birthday to Me!!!!.....yesterday
Alright, so you'd think one would be happy to turn a quarter of a century old.....
I mean....what's not to celebrate? You're half way to 50, you can finally rent a car (without having to go to a sketchy jeep rental place that couldn't care less like I did in maui last year), you can be friends with people who are 30 and not feel like you're hanging out with your parents' friends....but yesterday, well, it was a partially sad day....i returned to kingston to find that jared, kathy, and soren had already moved out :( - due to an unexpected health problem (don't worry, all is well now)....yet some of their stuff is still here, so it was super eerie....everytime i saw one of soren's little socks or stepped on a cheerio i burst into tears!!! and Chiara's room is completely empty, except for an Italian gossip magazine -(Raponi brothers I've got a present for you!!) so HOT 116 is no more...sigh.....but THEN my day was livened up by a terrific little dinner party where i dazzled my friends with my culinary brillance, which brightened my mood considerably, only to have it come crashing down to sheer embarassment when i learned that my friend had baked me a cake for a class that i had skipped that morning!!!!! ah, just my luck....hey -do you think my prof noticed that i wasn't there??
I mean....what's not to celebrate? You're half way to 50, you can finally rent a car (without having to go to a sketchy jeep rental place that couldn't care less like I did in maui last year), you can be friends with people who are 30 and not feel like you're hanging out with your parents' friends....but yesterday, well, it was a partially sad day....i returned to kingston to find that jared, kathy, and soren had already moved out :( - due to an unexpected health problem (don't worry, all is well now)....yet some of their stuff is still here, so it was super eerie....everytime i saw one of soren's little socks or stepped on a cheerio i burst into tears!!! and Chiara's room is completely empty, except for an Italian gossip magazine -(Raponi brothers I've got a present for you!!) so HOT 116 is no more...sigh.....but THEN my day was livened up by a terrific little dinner party where i dazzled my friends with my culinary brillance, which brightened my mood considerably, only to have it come crashing down to sheer embarassment when i learned that my friend had baked me a cake for a class that i had skipped that morning!!!!! ah, just my luck....hey -do you think my prof noticed that i wasn't there??
Sunday, January 02, 2005
Hurray I have a Blog!
Hello, internet world, here i am!
i never thought that i would have anything remotely close to reflecting the mirrored likeness of a website, but i have been inspired lately to see what all the "hoopla" is about. :) I remember when i was like 12 and my computer geek brother started playing around with something known as "bulletin boards" and i, being of course, much cooler than him (i did, of course, have New Kids on the Block glow-in-the-dark shoelaces) thought that he was wasting his time and this whole "internet thing" would never catch on. So as i carried on with my slumber parties and daydreaming about being Joey McIntyre's manager whom he was madly in love with, my brother slaved away at his computer learning the ins and outs of everything computer-ish....now, of course, he has a solid IT job in the States making twice as much money than i'll ever hope to make, and i'm....well, still daydreamin' (though the content has changed, albeit slightly).....well, that's enough blabbing for my first blog in the history of me....hurray for the information age!!
i never thought that i would have anything remotely close to reflecting the mirrored likeness of a website, but i have been inspired lately to see what all the "hoopla" is about. :) I remember when i was like 12 and my computer geek brother started playing around with something known as "bulletin boards" and i, being of course, much cooler than him (i did, of course, have New Kids on the Block glow-in-the-dark shoelaces) thought that he was wasting his time and this whole "internet thing" would never catch on. So as i carried on with my slumber parties and daydreaming about being Joey McIntyre's manager whom he was madly in love with, my brother slaved away at his computer learning the ins and outs of everything computer-ish....now, of course, he has a solid IT job in the States making twice as much money than i'll ever hope to make, and i'm....well, still daydreamin' (though the content has changed, albeit slightly).....well, that's enough blabbing for my first blog in the history of me....hurray for the information age!!
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